benjarvis.org

A Grand Day Out.

I bought a bus pass to get me though this month. I went out looking for work (since Target doesn’t seem to appreciate my stellar customer service), but came up mostly empty handed. I am determined to sell this truck and buy a car. I have had a car since I was 18 and not having one is starting to effect my self-esteem. I feel like a loser when people pick me up or drive me around. I would love to use public transportation if it got you any where, was on time, and wasn’t so creepy. I like the idea of less cars on the roads and less pollution, but damn if I don’t feel like one of the unwashed masses when I’m done. Is that bad? Am I narcissistic? I think all of us Americans are. It’s all narcissism and entitlement. However, I make the effort. I don’t talk to myself out loud or fart on the bus. I don’t make the “I’m gonna jack your cell phone face” at everyone. Heathens.

This means that now I can finally start seeing some of this town. I have been here 8 months and I still forget which way is north. I just need to get out more. It’s not so hard. I need to get off my ass and push back a little. I’ve have a plan and I am going to put it in to action.

Watched Hellraiser: Inferno. I liked it. I have a soft spot for Satanic supernatural monster horror movies. I’m not a big fan of “psychological” thrillers. They aren’t bad, but it’s always explained by “Hey, he was a nut job, what can you do?” I like the “this problem is deeper than we think and there is no real way of stopping it” sort of thriller. It’s more interesting to me. People do fucked up things. It happens all the time. I think we put to much emphasis on it, like the killers all have a big plan and reason. Women in frilly dresses are getting tied to rail-road tracks because daddy touched the killer’s pee-pee. Big whoop.